Can Anxiety Literally Kill You?

Search Results Jo Beckwith October, 2019

Today I woke up and typed into a search bar

"Can you die from anxiety?"

As in,

Can my ribs actually break

Shatter

Under the weight of it?

Can they splinter inside me and skewer my internal organs?

It seems impossible that it is so quiet around me when

Every vessel in me is screaming

When I’m gasping for air and yet somehow still breathing

I lay here in a silent room

Surrounded by safety

But my body is prepared for war

Adrenaline pumping

Heart racing

Bracing for the tiger attack I know is coming

Time is moving so fast

Flying by me

As I sit here immobile

Unable to contribute

Unable to do what I need to

Because I’m too busy preparing for a war I know isn’t coming

But my body is ready

It's always ready

I am simultaneously breathing

I am

I'm breathing

But my lungs are working too hard

In rooms that never have enough oxygen

The moment I awaken I feel the panic set in

Like my body knows before I do

That I can’t handle it

Every cell vibrates, it shakes

It never stops moving

I know I'm not well

This can’t be healthy

But the search results on my screen

Assure me it can’t kill me